15th Nov 2015 – 21th Nov 2015 [Tulsidas Mama]

 

Tuesday: It was action replay of 28^th Sept. Ashish [Chotu] called as I opened my lap top in office. The moment I saw his name flashing, I knew our Tulsidas Mama is no more. He was critical since 28^th. Old age, damaged liver, death of spouse and Bajaj tradition of leaving this world in pairs. I called mummy and tried to discourage her for visiting Mumbai. She is not keeping proper health. But she did not relent, and it was right thing to do, after all he was her closest brother. Letter I found out, it was not her health issue, but the knowledge that her brother is counting his last day was affecting her. 

We left Pune at 12 and reached Santacruze in time for last rites. It was kind of déjà-vu act. Maharaj, mourners, time of the day, even pyre pit were same. Soon fire consumed Mama's body, Maharaj did his routine of announcing choitha and we returned to Laxman Nivas, to take blessing from ladies of house.

Rajkumari aunty started this topic of age, by asking me, ‘How old are you?’ I honestly said, ‘60’. She was shocked and not ready to believe it. If I was woman, I would have being highly flattered. Ashu and Renu came to my rescue and told her their ages. When those figures were exchanged, everyone had only one statement to give, ‘How time flies….”. As we have to return to Pune, this topic was not elobrated more.

After saying bye, we drove back to Pune. Within 11 hours, we made return trip of Mumbai, had lunch and dinner on the way. All in comfort of AC SUV. Today, kids take this for granted and for people like us who had driven Fait for 12 hours for one side trip, in stifling heat and pollution, this is high level of luxury.

Tulsidas Mama.

 I have very fond memories of him. Earliest is when he started the routine of buying ‘Kulfi’ from that old guy, who used to sit opposite Ramji Ashar School. Chunni Uncle or Tulsi Mama would drop us at Ghatkopar routinely every week, till I started driving Mummy to Santacruze. Nani will pack tiffin which we will, including mama, would eat at our home in Ghatkopar with Dad, who would be there by the time we reached from Santacruze. And dinner will be topped up with Kulfi. Till date I love eating Kulfi and most of times I recall those days.

In 1966 we had gone on trip with Mamas to Nainital – Hardwar – Simla. Again, I remember one Kulfi incident of that trip.

We had reached Simla, and it was very cold. After settling in hotel, we all children and adults were strolling the market. It was evening and very cold. One kid saw 'Kulfiwala Thela' and said, let’s eat it. I said, ‘Not possible, it is so cold. No one will be allowed to eat.’ But Tulsi mama came and bought Kulfi for every kid. I was sidelined for raising objection of it being so cold etc. My leg was pulled by other adults. However I wanted to eat, badly. Other elders praised me to others kids, ‘See babloo, so sensible..’ etc. Now after all this I cannot turn back on my statement. Tulsi Mama understood this and as all others moved ahead, he held me back by shoulder as he paid for Kulfi and bought one for me also. Like for me Madhavdas Mama was Gori walla Mama, Tulsidas Mama was Kulfi Mama!

   

Then Mama had this big craving for ‘Bhel and Chats’ which Mummy and myself also have. Sometime back I and Renu saw Mama and Aunty eating Bhel and enjoying it. And Renu made nice comment, ‘So cute, I hope when we grow old and are in 70's, we can also enjoy something like this!’

Our interaction with Mama continued when I started driving car and there was no need to drop us at Ghatkopar. They stopped dropping Mummy at Ghatkopar, but then we started visiting Drive-In cinema at BKC. Many movies were just pretext for having dinner, chit chat and baby-picnic. Dad will occupy his folding chair, we would spread ‘Pharas’ and sit, have dinner, talk non sense and sometime watch movie played out on huge screen. We had fixed a slot at Drive-In with Chunni Uncle, Tulsi mama families. This last till drive was closed.

By nature this mama was very ‘Shant’, very brooding, thinking way ahead in future, worryings always, specially for future of his children. I had no idea why he would keep getting angry at Aunty. But at the same time I would notice he would protect her when others attacked her. Once I had asked him ‘Why he get’s angry at her?’ in reply he said, “Samjandi Nahe, Soche Samji kuj chaijee”. 

I think my question remained unanswered.

      

by P G Dodeja

25th Oct 2015 – 31th Oct 2015 [Savitri Aunty says bye]

 

One more example of life’s dramatic turns.

Sapna was with Akshay and Muskan, on 27^th night, enjoying a good wedding reception in Hydrabad, Vijay Bhagwandas Dodeja’s one and only daughter Bhavni was getting married to Sapna’s relative. She informed Akshay that Savitri Aunty was getting discharged from hospital in morning, her stein has worked well and she is ok now. Flow of life turned, and suddenly Savitri Aunty was no more in morning of 28^th. I rushed to Santacruz for her last rites, along with Mummy – Lali – Manju – Avi – Pinky. When Sapna meet me at Santacruz, she remarked, just 12 hours back I was at wedding with your son, and now I am with you, for Antim Yatra!

 And to add more drama Tulsidas mama is also hospitalized for sever Jaundice in same hospital. He was also very critical.

Savitri Bajaj

My third number mami, third one to go.

Dad used to say that ‘she is most typical shikarpuri woman. Even though not educated in modern terms, she is very modern, aware of her surrounding socially, economically, spiritually.’ She was very good source of information on sindhi relatives, well aware of happing in and around her. 

One of the very few families are connected with south Mumbai, and she was one of them. And she will share hard facts without any biased or ulterior objective.

And after Dad, I replaced him in respect of gossiping and exchanging notes with her on regular basis. But my range was at gossiping level of immediate family. Just few weeks back I spoke with her for 42 minutes. And this was norm. I had reduced my interaction with her, due to my other pressing matters, earlier, one call in 15 days with her was necessary, more so for me.

My earliest memory of her is, she sitting with Nani, taking stock of cloths with ‘Dhobi’. My tiny mind registered a picture of Two Nani’s, one unnecessary scolding me for jumping on pile of cloths, accumulated for dhobi. Nani will scold, saying ‘Lughi Vanday..’ [will get hurt] and aunty will protect by saying let the kid play. And after death of official Nani in year 1972, Savitri Aunty was defacto Nani for me. I used to tease her as proxy Nani and she would enjoy that.

 Laxman Nivas has seen four Yugs. Satya Yug was when Laxman Nivas was one story building, our Nani used to rule, I was ‘nikker walla’ small boy along with our gang of five. It was totally chilled out period. Than came Tritya Yug. Family division bisected Laxman Nivas, horizontally. Most of the edlers of Satya Yug were no more, the young couples of Satyug were now elders. We ‘nikker – gang’ were married and raising our own family. After two decades, in ‘Dwapar’ Yug, one story building was replaced with 6 story tall structure. Our Nikker – gang was now counted in (early) ‘elder’s’ stage. The kids of gang were now married and raising own family, in simple words, turned into grandparents.

In all this turmoil, Savitri Aunty – Rajkumari Aunty and Mummy are strong thread, bringing the culture of Satya Yugh to Dwapar Yugh. The cultural transition, passing of ‘Sanskars’ and Values was through them only. And I believe Savtri Aunty was torch bearer of anchorage of the Bajaj family. Many will disagree with me but she really had subtle influence and was more direct and verbal.   

Today, she has left us, leaving Nikker – Gang as family elders, [all are now grand parents]. How Mummy, Rajkumari Aunty, Jyoti, Kanika etc will handle her loss, I do not know, but I will remember her laugher over the phone line on my silly comments, her concern and gentle advise for others. She will have always wise words in handling of DIL’s, raising children, solving matrimonial issues.

I specifically remember, she saying, ‘Babloo, you are eldest brother, so forgive and forget Sanjay and try to patch up with him.’ Mind you, she did not have any soft corner for Sanjay neither he had requested her to say such thing, it was her wisdom, her culture, her foresight.

 

by P G Dodeja

The 19 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Death*

1. After being decapitated, the average person remains conscious for an additional 15-20 seconds. Talk about a way to go.

2. Mourning your dear departed cat? You could shave your eyebrows like the ancient Egyptians used to. Then again, maybe a trip to the pet cemetery would be easier.

3. May want to rethink what you bury your loved ones in. An old wives’ tale claims that if a woman is buried wearing the color black, she’ll come back to haunt the family.

4. Speaking of preventing hauntings, yet another old wives tale led to the institution of burial wreaths. It was believed that the wreath would encircle the spirit of the dead person, thereby preventing them from returning from the grave.

5. In 1931, Henry Ford decided to preserve his friend, Thomas Edison’s last dying breath. He kept it in a bottle. Hope he put a label on that one.

6. One of the main reasons cowboys carried pistols in the 1800’s was to avoid being dragged to
death by their horse. You think they could have just gotten bigger stirrups.

7. The last words spoken by Union General John Sedgewick were, “They (the Confederate soldiers) couldn’t hit an elephant from this dis…”

8. So much for the curse of good ole King Tut. Despite reports that all twenty-two people who were present at the exhumation kicked the bucket, twenty-one were still kicking ten years later.

9. If someone plans to jump off Mount Everest to commit suicide, you’ll need a lot of patience. It takes the average person 2.5 minutes to hit bottom. And we don’t want to know who timed it.

10. Here’s a job I definitely wouldn’t want to have. When Pyrenees beekeepers die, someone has to go around and splash every single one of their bees with black ink.

11. John Bowman, a tanner from Vermont believed that after his death he would be reincarnated with his pre-deceased wife and children. So, he ordered his house staff to have dinner on the table every night, just in case. They finally stopped in 1950 when the money finally dried up.

12. Think your décor is bad? Oscar Wilde’s last words were, "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or other of us has got to go" He fought the wallpaper and the wallpaper won.

13. An old superstition stated that if the doors in the house were locked, the soul of a dying person couldn’t get out.

14. Yet another superstition warns against pointing at a funeral procession, with the dire warning that you’ll die within a month. More proof for that whole three fingers pointing back at you thing.

15. Might want to read the labels a little more carefully. Nearly 2,500 lefties are killed every year using products meant for righties. Who knew? Now, just back away from those right-handed scissors.

16. A pet-parrot caused a ruckus at President Andrew Jackson’s funeral. His crime? Swearing during the ceremony. Guess he should have given Polly just one more cracker.

17. That ballpoint pen? The one you’re chewing on? Might want to put it down. 100 people are killed every year by choking on a ballpoint pen. Which proves the old quote about the pen being mightier than the sword. At least some of the time.

18. Apparently, they really are virtually indestructible. A cockroach can reportedly live up to 9 days without its head. The only reason they finally kick over? Starvation.

19. And you thought sex appeal was the first to go. Allegedly, it’s actually your sight that goes first when you die. It’s your hearing that’s the last to go…. What was that?
* These 19 statements have been collected from various sources and are for entertainment and discussion. The authenticity of these is for you to discuss and research on your own.

by bloggeroid